All is gray.
My firstborn is staring out...beautiful as anything you might find in the Getty....
I wrap around her and whisper "Take a mental picture."
She responds, as most times, with "Why?"
"Because one day, when you are having problems at school, and you feel alone...go back to this picture. Remember that God created the endless ocean and all this beauty. If he can do that, there is no problem you face that He can't fix. Take a picture and save it in your mind."
I believe this with my whole heart. I've practiced it.
I've practiced it well...and UN-well.
I've rehearsed photographs in my mind.
Photos of victory and grace.
Photos of failure and sin.
I've had to work hard to re-train my fallible, sometimes unyielding brain. It's not easy.
Romans 8 screams at me this morning after my exchange with Syd "For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. 6 For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. 7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to the law of God, nor indeed can be. 8 So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God."
I have struggled with mind issues all my days.
The will to live in peace and submission battles the fleshly will to remember and desires lust of the flesh...idols to replace the Christ that came to save me...
There is a war.
But what I'm learning is this:
When we search out sex...
When we search out alcohol...
When we search out drugs...
When we search out designer threads...
When we search out physical perfection...
When we search out companionship and love in another fallible human...
When we search out financial security...
We are really searching for something deeper. We are searching for God. The one "hole filler" that fills every desire...every crack...every want...
Completely.
Our desires are leading us to the deeper questions (Shout out to "A Kingdom Named Desire" read it!)....What do I REALLY want?
When we begin to ask ourselves this question, the answer just might come back startlingly clear...
We want otherworldly love.
Sex, alcohol, drugs, designer threads, physical perfection, companionship, financial security have no chance of providing the sustenance to fill this need.
I must alter my mind back to the things of God. Face down my desires. Realize that my desires are deeply rooted in the soul issues.
I want God.
Yet, I also want sex, perfection, companionship, stuff, and security.
The choice has to be made and carried out in my internal dwelling place...day by day...
Who can fill these voids...FULLY?
GOD.
GOD.
GOD.
I must rehearse the photographs of the mind...
Photographs of Grace...of mercy...of shelter...of sustenance...of love...of His touch...of truth...
Ahhh...truth...truth of who I am...truth of who He is...
Truth.
When I can rehearse the photos of God and answer the soul questions with Him...Flesh loses...Mandy and God win. Score!!!
Grace n Peace,
A ~
Insightful but very blatant post. Nice to know someone around the world is honest.
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