"I've arrived. Have you been waiting on me?"

I am sitting at my desk looking out into sunlight...night is approaching and all is still around me.
I find this moment most peaceful and unnerving. I fight the stillness because when I am still and quiet I must heed the emotions my heart wants to run from...

I look out the window upon masses of trees...strong and able...they seem to beckon my soul to let go...to embrace...

Momentarily...the ache turns to stillness and I am left alone with Him...with the thoughts He has for me...the dreams He has for me...tears drip onto my keys as I type for I know He is in it all...

Every sunlit afternoon...every dark night...every contrived notion that I could come up with for life...every destined place of His will...

He is in them all. 


Forever beckoning me onward...


He is mine. I am His. 

Birds singsong past my window and I am captured again in all that is beauty...all that reminds me there is more...all that says...trek on...keep moving...these...these moments propel my soul onward...ever gazing forward while wanting to look back...but I can't...

I cannot do justice to the past...only strive into the future...unheeding...challenging it with a gaze and stance that says "I've arrived. Have you been waiting on me?"

Blue sky unfolded before my eyes reminds me that tomorrow will come...sooner than later...and I will need to live it. Not exist in it. Live it. It's imperative. I will need to rise...full on life and His promises...draw a boundary around this day and declare it mine for the taking. Tomorrow laid out in plans and journals...notated in my list of dreams...but today...today is all I have with this blue sky...

I look down upon the ground from my window and see our neighbor dog meander through the foliage towards the house...He's unencumbered...strolling towards some fun I might imagine or if lucky a scrap of food...unencumbered nonetheless...He is present...I am reminded to be present...to not look back...this pup...He never once looks back...because...to be present...you cannot look back...gaze is locked in the moment and all is unencumbered...stay present my mind breathes...

As I finish typing my soul still sighs...it still leans into the moments I am trying to avoid...yet peace is tangible...thick...the sun is lower...my heart is steady...this...this moment reminds me that it is forever possible to ache...yet be completely enveloped in a steady flow of peaceful knowing...such are the things of life...bittersweet joys and losses...humanity will always gain and lose...much like the setting sun...

The beauty is...the sun always rises again...

Grace n Peace,

A ~