Living to Die...FOR REAL ;-)

As I write this posting, tears blur my eyes and my chin quivers. I am deeply entranced in the radical discipleship that we all have been called to embrace. I risk rambling in this post because of the overwhelming emotion of the call I feel upon my life. Upon all our lives. 


We are called to live as though we want to die. Die to the American dream and the security that this dream threatens to deceive us with it's false promises. There is NO security that is iron-clad except the security of the Father. He is all we have to link ourselves to in the end.


I am almost finished with "Radical: Taking Back your Faith from the American Dream" by David Platt. I am humbled and transformed by the way God is directing my steps through this study. I sat down this evening to study the Word and felt led to Matthew. I've been led to the Gospels...His words...the red words the last few weeks. Desperate to know what Jesus instructed the disciples to do...to be...what His calling was for those of us who wanted to first know him and the power of His resurrection, and second have eternal security with Him in the afterlife. 


So...I began reading in Matthew...I read through several chapters until I came to the story of the rich young ruler. I've read this story several times lately. It wrecks me. I read it again and it becomes crystal clear to me: Jesus was instructing the new breed of disciples that would follow Him to live...without regard to themselves...to their "stuff"... 


Jesus made it very clear throughout the New Testament that we are not to store up wealth. We are to live with enough. We are to trust Him to provide when we do not have "enough". We are to give away to those with less when we have "more than enough".  I find no talk of saving. I find no talk of storing up treasures in 401K plans and larger homes. I find no talk of the best clothing. All I find is...Don't worry. I will provide for you. Enough. Matthew 6: 25:-34 says "Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? ²⁷ Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? 
²⁸ “So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; ²⁹ and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ³⁰ Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 
³¹ “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. ³³ But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."

Can it be any more clear? We are to first seek the Kingdom of God. I realize this is not a new concept. However, I cannot say I have practiced it. I can say I've practiced the American dream. I've practiced trying to put money away in savings for retirement. This is not evil or sinful in any way. Yet, I don't find instruction to do so. I find myself instructed to seek the Kingdom first. Isn't the Kingdom His lost world? I find my whole parameter of life and paradigm shifted day by day in this "radical" abandonment. 


If I really am following Christ...my treasures will be "laid up in Heaven"...


What can be laid up in Heaven? People. That's it. PEOPLE. As I type this simple sentence I begin to weep...PEOPLE. They are the riches of Him. Nothing else. How self-absorbed and stupid I've been for 34 years. PEOPLE...

God is calling His people to a deeper walk than talk. It's time. He told his disciples they WOULD be persecuted...not MIGHT be persecuted for Him. We skip over these parts for the American dream. I cannot any longer. I am wrestling with my most ingrained theories, fears, thoughts, and ideologies. I am dislodging prejudices and plans to make way for radical abandonment to the Kingdom. I am preparing for whatever, wherever, whenever He lays the next step on my heart. I am preparing vocationally to be used in the Kingdom. I am preparing my children to be used in the Kingdom. We will not be idle. We will not be status quo. We will not sit by and watch our world suffer alone. We will radically abandon no matter the price we must pay and the status we might lose.

I confess that my materialism and selfish nature is a hard battle. I want to buy shoes and starbucks. But the shift has begun, I cannot do those things now without thinking of the 41% of citizens of India that compile the world's poorest. I cannot stand the notion that I'm buying stilettos and a child just died from starvation. It causes my stomach to wretch and my heart to break. 

I have no judgement for others whose path may be different. We are in this great cause together. There are many different roles. But now that God has woken the cause within me, and began the steps of my life towards greater service...I cannot shut off the call. 

I continue to study the life of Jesus and his teachings. I will to the best of my flawed ability live them out and engrain them in my children. I will continue to study the lives of those Christians who went before us and gave thier lives so we could take His glory on to the Children of God who have not heard His voice or felt His love in their lives. 

I'm radical.

It's been building since the day I was born. 

I've always felt it. I've always wanted it. I just didn't recognize it.

I'm getting it now. 

I'm living to die. 

Dying is the gain one day. 

Anything in this world that takes me and His lost Children closer to the Kingdom is truly gain. 

I plan to go all out. 

Read "Radical" by David Platt. 

Read "Matthew - NKJV" by Jesus. 

I dare you.

Be prepared. Life will never be the same. YOU will never be the same.

Grace n Peace,

A ~